Sunday, June 10, 2012

No, they're not "magic pills"

I've stopped telling people about my endocrine / metabolic disorder.

Why? Because 90% of the people who ask me how I've lost weight, when I tell them, have one of the following two reactions:

#1 - I wish I could take a magic pill and watch it melt off.

How me going thru years of struggling to lose weight, busting my butt with a personal trainer, trying various different eating plans, and nothing working, then going thru tons of testing, being diagnosed with a disorder, and going thru intensive drug therapy while watching what I eat is the same as "taking a magic pill and it melting off"... well, that's beyond me.
And, quite frankly, it kinda ticks me off. It completely dismisses not only the work I've done to change my lifestyle since being diagnosed, but also all the work I did in the years prior trying. And yes, if they weren't there to actually see it, I make sure they know as I'm telling my story.
But all they hear is "drug = weight loss". Grr.

#2 - I think I have that too. What's your endocrinologist's name?
Okay, yes, other people have this disorder. Having talked to people about this, there have been 2 others just in my circle that I honestly believe may have the same / similar disorder, and I recommended to each of them that they see an endocrinologist to get checked out.
But... if you are shoving a 2nd piece of cake into your mouth while simultaneously telling me why you don't understand why you keep gaining weight or why your sugar isn't controlled despite being diabetic & being on medication, and you admit that you haven't tried any sort of eating plan or physical activity in years... and especially if you have a history of being thin (most people with this disorder struggled with their weight their entire lives, as did I), and it's only since getting older / becoming less active / eating crap that you've gained weight... I'm not saying you definitely don't have a disorder, but I am saying that you should try using some common sense before subjecting yourself to the testing required to find out, and the embarrassment of trying to convince a reputable doctor that you're not just lazy and/or disillusioned.

Because that's where I was when I made the appointment. I reached a point where I was so fed up with trying & failing to lose the weight, I was so distraught over my trainer yelling at me in a gym full of people that I "must be lying" about following their plan, because if I followed even half of it I would have lost a ton of weight by now, I was so fed up with myself, with my weight that I had to know for sure.

I realized when I made the appointment that this was it. I'd researched my doctors, and knew this one would figure it out. And I knew there was only one of two answers: Either
    a) he'd find out what was wrong with me & I'd get treatment, or
    b) he'd tell me I really was just a lazy fata** and needed to get off my butt

It was scary. Terribly scary. I was so worried he would tell me it was "b", and I'd be right back where I started, feeling like I'd tried everything and nothing worked, but apparently I just wasn't trying hard enough.

For me, it turned out to be "a" - but 2nd-piece-of-cake complainers... you know, deep down, that it would be "b". You know it would. When you're shoving sugar into your mouth in the form of cake, ice cream, pop, sweet tea and the like and then while doing it complaining that you can't get your diabetes under control... don't tell me you don't know why.

And so I stopped telling people. I don't want to feed into our society's obsession with "magic pills" (there's no such thing!) and I'm tired of trying not to be cruelly blunt when faced with people in denial about their own bad habits.

So when people ask me now, unless it's someone I really trust and am close to and who knew my weight loss struggle intimately before - I just tell people I've been watching what I eat. Totally true. Just omitting those months of being on 7 different controlled substances and the maintenance meds I'll probably have to be on my entire life. You know, those "magic pills". Grr.

1 comment:

mom2kmjx2 said...

People just don't want to admit fault. They want to live in thier own world and believe that nothing they do is thier fault. My WHOLE family is big. I was tired of being big so I did something about it. At first I kept quiet but as surgery got closer the word got out. I got Well we are all like this why do you want to be different, or my favorite. bring regular sode but get yelled out because you know we all have diabetes(I just bring water not I dont drink soda anymore). Im sorry ahain people need to wake up.

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