Thursday, April 25, 2013


I called to get my results this morning. Down to a "2", so now it's official.

This sucks.

I feel like the nurse kinda shrugged off my questions.

Told her I'm pretty sure I haven't passed anything, she said no worries, that can take a few weeks.

WEEKS?!? Really?!?

Asked when I can resume normal activity, she said whenever I feel up to it.

Really? Because I feel like curling up on the couch under a blanket and staring off into space until I fall asleep. Will you get me a doctor's note for work? Because that's what I feel like doing for the forseeable future.

She offered that they recommend women wait 3 full cycles before trying again. But that's just a precaution. We can start whenever we want to. No reason to think we wouldn't have a healthy pregnancy on the next cycle.

Really? Then why the 3 month guideline? This makes no sense to me.

I'm having a hard enough time dealing with the emotional stuff. Also known as doing my best to put it out of my mind so I can function. Why can't someone just tell me what to do about the medical stuff? I just want someone to tell me what to do, what to expect. All this vagueness and seeming double-talk does nothing to comfort me, make me feel better, give me any sense of reassurance. I need concrete... something.


areyoukiddingme said...

I'm sorry for your loss. It really sucks.

They can't tell you what to do because they don't really have an answer for that. In most cases, when it's so early, there's nothing to be done. However, if you don't have a period or start bleeding by the time you would be likely to next, you might want to ask for a more thorough follow-up with a trans-vaginal ultrasound.

The 3 full cycles is mostly for their benefit, so they can more easily predict the estimated due date. If you try again now, it will be harder to pinpoint when exactly your menstrual cycle started (because it's all messed up due to the pregnancy). They also recommend it so you give yourself a chance to grieve. Other than that, there's no certain biological reason to wait. (Possible uterine lining issues, but not anything that's been medically proven as far as I can tell.)

I hope you're feeling better soon. But there's no reason you should bounce right back. Pregnancy loss is not some minor deal - it's a very emotional thing.

S said...

I'm sorry. I've had a couple of early miscarriages at around the same gestation as you are/were, and the bleeding I had was about the same as a usual period for me.

'Yellow Rose' Jasmine said...

I trusted your instincts- and so I just knew that what you already knew was true. Still... so sorry about all this. It's really not fair to go through all this and have people not acknowledge how real and sorrowful your loss is. I hope that you can find someone close by that will be a source of strength for you. Take care of you and be patient with yourself.

Melissa said...

Boooo :( So sorry, honey. Wish I knew what to tell you. But, I'm rootin' for ya!

Steph{anie} said...

I hate that you're hurting. Sending lots of love your way; can't wait to give you a hug in person soon.

Susan said...

I am so sorry. If only I had the answers....Words just don't make it better. I have been there. Sending prayers for comfort and healing.

Marianne said...

Really, really sorry that you had to go through this. It IS a loss - unfortunately, not everyone sees it this way, or if they do, don't know what to say.

Unknown said...

I'm so sorry. We waited 6 months and all was well. I know how hard it is. Take care of you. <3

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