Sunday, September 13, 2009

"Date" Your Spouse

FireMan and I try to have date nights monthly. We ask someone to watch FireGirl overnight, and the two of us go out on a date. Just us. No friends, no baby, just able to focus on each other.

I honestly don't know how marriages survive having a baby if couples don't do this. It has been a life-saver for us.

So last night was one of those nights. And we had a GREAT date night. Nothing fancy. Dinner at a BBQ joint, ran an errand at the mall, went shopping for FireGirl's birthday (probably not really appropriate for date night), then a movie. It's not so much about what you do, it's about spending time together, just the two of you. Reconnecting with one another.

So anyway, while we were walking the mall, one of the topics that came up in conversation, sort of, was how we treat each other. How we speak to one another. The little things we do that irritate one another. Later in the night, as I was dwelling on this mall conversation, it dawned on me.

Dating your spouse shouldn't end with one night. It should be infused in how you treat each other as well.
Think about it. For example: when you were dating, if you did something to upset your partner (even a little thing), what would you do? You'd try to fix it, right? Do everything to make it better, right? What about now? Would you still do everything you could to make it better? Or would you just go about your day and tell yourself that if they're upset it's their problem? That they're too sensitive?

That's just one example. I'm not saying spend every day acting like a gushing little schoolgirl (or boy). Just let the thought cross your mind from time to time.
Ladies, if you got all dressed up for your partner when you were dating, do you do it now? Gentlemen, if you opened the car door for your partner when you were dating, do you do it now?
Just think about the little things, the little actions and the frame of mind that you had when you were dating.

And really "date" your spouse. Not just on the occasional night out together, but all the time.

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